A little slow. Period.

I want to not only restate my previous disclaimer, *** I am a person with good common sense and above average intelligence *** I want to add to it. * AND I have an excellent vocabulary.*

I love those Reader's Digest quizzes each month on Word Power because I generally get a perfect score - and who doesn't like to have a perfect score in something at least once a month?

I'm good with words. I have no problem changing the word include into encapsulate. Need a phrase for "working together?" How about "in conjunction with? Don't want to use the term separate? Why not try out differentiate and see how that will work in your sentence.

I've been working with hoity toity vocabulary words frequently (that means often) lately as Susan and I have been preparing a grant application for Hope Central. If you need to say a whole lot of something about nothin', I'm your gal.

So I have a firm grasp on language. Really. I do. Usually.

All that being said, I'm now about to reveal a few things that are a never ending source of amusement to my daughter. It has come to my attention over the last few years that certain words have a very clear meaning behind them -- if you bother to think about it.

Perhaps now you will understand why it just strikes me as hilarious every time I shop here:

Did you realize that this symbol for Target stores is a bullseye? Like a real archery target? I just figured that out a few years ago. When I called Andi to tell her (as I stood in the parking lot no less, staring at that big target), she just laughed uproariously.........(that means loud and noisy.) I'm sure the people that were driving by could hear her with no problem whatsoever.

Another one I figured out all by my lonesome last year was this one:

Were you aware that this is called a scarecrow because its job is to scare crows? Yeah, go figure. Somebody put a lot of thought into that word and I never bothered to think about it at all. I just always called them scarecrows because that is the word I was taught to call them.

Now - before you mock me - and I KNOW there are mockers out there, stop and consider this fact. Most words you learn as a child are just that - words. They have no secret meaning waiting to come out and embarrass you 40 years later. Good examples are car, truck, house and roof. Just words. So perhaps you can see why I never gave it much thought. Perhaps not.

I leave you with one last "Perriism" -- a word I just made up which means "Good grief, doesn't she pay attention to anything she says?"

The other day as Sherie and I were building a work table in my garage I thought to myself, "I wouldn't mind sawing so much if it weren't so dusty." And just like that a light bulb went off in my brain and I understood the meaning of the word sawdust. I didn't share that at the time, but I'm telling it now. Do you get it? Saw + dust = sawdust. Cool, huh?

Isn't it good to know that you are spending your time reading such an intellectual soul?

If you know of any obvious meaning words that I may have missed over the last 45 years or so, feel free to mention them. Save me the trouble of figuring them out for myself. I have other things to think about - things like inventing my own words and such.

Nothing from Bill yet on my little deception - I'll let you know his reaction once he finds out - if he ever does.

Edited after Cheryl's comment to show what she was referring to: See the word spelling out IVY in the tree? I never noticed it. At all. Billski finally did read my blog today and he was just having a jolly good laugh at my expense over this post and THEN he read the one about how I had bamboozled him on the IQ test.

Disbelief washed over him and I wish I had it filmed. He just could not believe that he had been the victim of such a low down, dirty rotten scheme (or something like that). It was hilarious.