A Lesson in Cholesterol

You all know what cholesterol is - that stuff that builds up in the walls of your arteries causing heart attacks, strokes and heart disease.

Well, if I croak this week it shouldn't be from any of these, at least according to my cholesterol levels. This is one of life's little mysteries to me. How I, someone who eats at fast food resteraunts way too often for it to be even considered average can be so dang healthy. Not that I'm complaining mind you -- it's just strange.

Once again, I had my physical and after the doctor called to give me my results of my blood work, Andi just stares at me and asks, "How can this be? How do you do this?" I know in her mind she is picturing me as one large french fry.

I don't know how I do it. It's just a gift. Seems to me that my arteries would be so clogged that there would be no hope of anything getting through there - but not according to my blood work. I always picture one long french fry snaking its way through my veins waiting to strike me down. But in fact, my blood work came back better than it's ever been before. My total cholesterol level dropped 32 points since the last time it was checked and it was in the normal range then.

So on to the lesson.......all you ever wanted to know about cholesterol and more. High blood cholesterol signals a higher risk of heart attack and stroke. That’s why it’s important to have your cholesterol levels checked regularly and discuss them with
your doctor. A “lipoprotein profile” is a test to find out your blood cholesterol numbers. It gives information about total cholesterol, LDL (bad) cholesterol and HDL (good) cholesterol, as well as triglycerides (blood fats). You should fast to do this (I did.)

What Do My Cholesterol Levels Mean?
Total Blood Cholesterol Levels:
Less than 200 mg/dL = Desirable (lower risk)
200 to 239 mg/dL = Borderline high (higher risk)
240 mg/dL and above = High blood cholesterol (more than twice the risk as desirable level)

My total cholesterol was 167, down from 199 a few years ago. I suppose that is because of the weight I lost last year.

LDL stands for low-density lipoprotein. This is the main carrier of harmful cholesterol in your blood. A high level of LDL cholesterol
means there’s a higher risk of heart disease and stroke.

LDL Cholesterol Levels:
Less than 100 mg/dL = Optimal for people with heart disease or diabetes
100 to 129 mg/dL = Near or above optimal
130 to 159 mg/dL = Borderline high
160 to 189 mg/dL = High
190 mg/dL and above = Very High

My LDL was 100, which is a great number to have.

HDL stands for high-density lipoprotein. HDL is “good” cholesterol because it seems to lower your risk of heart attack and stroke.
That means that — unlike other cholesterol levels — the higher your HDL, the better. You can raise your HDL by quitting smoking, losing excess weight and being more active.

HDL Cholesterol Levels:
Less than 40 mg/dL = Low HDL (higher risk)
40 to 59 mg/dL = The higher, the better
60 mg/dL and above = High HDL (lower risk)

My HDL was 59.

Triglycerides are the most common type of fat in your body. They’re also a major energy source. They come from food, and your body also makes them. As people get older, gain excess weight or both, their triglyceride and cholesterol levels tend to rise. Many people who have heart disease or diabetes have high fasting triglyceride levels. Some studies have shown that people with above-normal fasting triglyceride levels (150 mg/dL or higher) have a higher risk of heart disease and stroke.

The National Cholesterol Education Program guidelines for triglycerides are:

Less than 150 mg/dL = Normal
150 to 199 mg/dL = Borderline High
200-499 mg/dL = High
500 mg/dL and above = Very High

Mine were 54mg/dL. I'd say that was practically anti-normal. I'm a happy gal today.

It ain't fair - but it's a fact. All the skinny, salad eating, meat avoiding people in my family seem to have cholesterol levels out the roof, while I, a fried food, red meat lover have arteries that seem to flow like they've just been cleaned with a septic snake.

It's enough to make me want to go fry up a mess of potatoes in bacon grease to celebrate.