From out of the blue

I got this text this afternoon from Carly. I’ve gotten these kind of texts several times over the years from her.  I think this, however, will be the last one.  Whether she is truly done or not, I believe I am.  

 

A month ago, she got furious at Wes because he told me she was moving to Tennessee, and I asked her about it. I asked her because I had spoken to her the same day and she told me she had just renewed her lease. She told Wes she didn’t want me to know anything about her life. At that point, I quit asking about her life and our conversations were superficial and generic. How are you doing? Hope things are OK. That sort of thing.  

Seems I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t, but it’s much more peaceful if I don’t and I think that’s what I’m going with.

Now, for the text-

After much consideration, I've come to realize that the relationship you and I have is not one I'm willing to pursue anymore. You choose not to want to talk to me or go out of your way to want to foster a relationship, and quite And this was just an out of the blue text this afternoon 

After much consideration, I've come to realize that the relationship you and I have is not one I'm willing to pursue anymore. You choose not to want to talk to me or go out of your way to want to foster a relationship, and quite frankly I have come to accept that. I'm tired of having to be the first person to reach out to you for anything at this point.

I appreciate all the things you have done to help me through life, but it doesn't excuse the abuse that I was put through as a child/teenager that I still to this day struggle with. I am a person worthy of having a mother who wants to be an active participant in her life. Something that you've come to show me you do not want. 

I am not asking nor seeking for a pity party from you. I'm genuinely just done. I've come to accept my worth and you don't deserve me in your life. Which is pretty sad because I'm a great person. If Andi, Shaun, and everyone else chooses to stop a relationship with me, that is on them. I have no ill will for anyone including you.

I'm done. That's really all there is to it. I'll pay you the rest of the money for the car as I have been. Just tell me how much is left and I will make the payments accordingly. But after that, I don't want a relationship with you. 

Thank you for raising me. Thank you for helping mold me into the person I am today. Thank you for providing for me over the years. I will always love you. However, this life has shown that we just weren't meant to have a relationship. I've made my peace and I hope you will as well. I have come to accept that. I'm tired of having to be the first person to reach out to you for anything at this point.

I appreciate all the things you have done to help me through life, but it doesn't excuse the abuse that I was put through as a child/teenager that I still to this day struggle with. I am a person worthy of having a mother who wants to be an active participant in her life. Something that you've come to show me you do not want. 

I am not asking nor seeking for a pity party from you. I'm genuinely just done. I've come to accept my worth and you don't deserve me in your life. Which is pretty sad because I'm a great person. If Andi, Shaun, and everyone else chooses to stop a relationship with me, that is on them. I have no ill will for anyone including you.

I'm done. That's really all there is to it. I'll pay you the rest of the money for the car as I have been. Just tell me how much is left and I will make the payments accordingly. But after that, I don't want a relationship with you. 

Thank you for raising me. Thank you for helping mold me into the person I am today. Thank you for providing for me over the years. I will always love you. However, this life has shown that we just weren't meant to have a relationship. I've made my peace and I hope you will as well.